All of us have times when we go "I just can't cope with this anymore". Some people call it stress, others see it as too much pain. Both of those can be tools for our spiritual advancement if they are approached properly.

Both stress and pain are ways our minds, emotions, bodies and spirits have of telling us we need to pay attention to something. I'm not advocating worry here. Worry is a waste of time and effort. If you applied the time spent worrying to finding a practical solution to the thing you're worrying about you'd be much farther ahead and discover there wasn't so much to worry about after all.

I'm going to use the word "pain" to refer to both pain and stress from here on. Pain is, as I said, the Universe's way of getting our attention, of telling us there is a lesson to be learned in the experience. When we pay attention to the cause of the pain, and look at it with an attempt at understanding what the lesson is, we alleviate the pain. We "get " the lesson, and the pain falls away, it's purpose satisfied. If left untended, and the lesson continues to be repeated to try to break through, despair can be the result. Despair is pain on pain on pain, until the lesson is considered and learned.

Another thing that affects our lives negatively is anger and hatred. Both those are rooted in fear. We get angry, or hate, because we're afraid of the thing confronting us. We are afraid because we don't know what the consequences of the "thing" are going to be in our lives. We are afraid because the "thing" is the unknown, but we don't want to admit, often even to ourselves, we're afraid, so we hide the fear behind anger or hatred believing those things make us no longer afraid. All that actually does is create a self-sustaining whirlpool of fear/anger/hatred/fear/anger/etc.

To step out of the cycle we need to embrace the possibility of change. Change of ourselves, change in the world around us, change in the people we're interacting with. When we embrace the possibility of change, we are becoming curious, we are seeking understanding. We are reaching out to include the "other" in ourselves in recognition that there is really no division, that everything is an aspect of the Divine of which we are a part. Did not one of the greatest teachers, Jesus of Nazareth, say "Ye are all sons and daughters of God"? Most religions teach the ultimate desire and fate of the human soul is reunification with the Divine in some way. To step through the fear and reach out for understanding is to practice for this ultimate event.

Once we begin to understand, we also begin to feel compassion. Our understanding begins to merge with the "other" to allow us to stop fearing and being angry. We learn to see what led the "other" to act and feel as it does, to be what it is, and we can embrace the differences between us with respect. From this place, it is but a short step to Love, to cherishing the "other" for the things that we began by being afraid of, that we hid our fear of behind anger or hatred.

Seeing through the anger or hatred to the fear, and then seeing through the fear to begin understanding is not an easy path to commence. It is easier to keep our eyes closed and continue reacting as we always have. And there are elements of the society and world around us which will encourage us to stay static, to take the easy path, if for no other reason than seeing you change makes them uncomfortable because it encourages them to change too. Those elements may even reject you, and shun you for not agreeing with their world-view any longer. That, also, makes the path of change more difficult, especially if those are people you love or respect. But if you persist, your life will get easier, happier and more free as there is less for you to fear.

The more people who face their fears and attempt understanding, compassion and eventually Love, the better place this world will be. It is one of those things which has a snowball effect. If you give up fear for understanding, your peace and happiness will shine as a light to those around you. That light will encourage them to join you in banishing fear in themselves. They will affect the other people around them, and your light will shine out on the whole world. What a wonderful legacy to leave when you cross the final bridge!